I was told that if I kept praying, start keeping my word, show up and work hard every day that things in my life would get better and change.
I turned my life around and started doing everything everyone told me to stay on the right path and improve my life for the better. For a while, I thought that things would just magically get better if I started doing all the right things. They did start to get better but, it didn’t seem like everything was falling into place fast enough for me. But, I didn’t give up and I kept going and doing everything I needed to be doing to improve my own life. I really wanted to fix my relationships with my brothers. Through the years, we grew apart and because of my addiction, they stopped talking to me almost altogether. When I got back on my feet and in a good place in my life it really sucked not having the same relationship we did when we were growing up.
My relationship with them did start to improve once I got clean and really set out to change my life; our relationship did improve too. It started slow and we spoke just a little bit more than before and saw each other on holidays. But, it still was missing the love and happiness I wanted in our relationship. It wasn’t until I took a month and wrote everything that I appreciated about them and missed about them that our dynamic really changed.
As much as I wanted things to just change, I knew it was going to be a lot of work. I couldn’t just write a list of what I was grateful for and watch the change happen. I put in the hard work to change the relationships around me and repair the bridges I thought I had burned. After 6 years of recovery, I can look at my life now and appreciate the things I have and the life I am living. It sends a shock through my system. I get emotional when I think about how far I have actually come and the things I have done to repair my past and change my future for the better. It’s a process that has changed me forever and something I hope you can work on yourself!
Now, my relationship with my brothers has been improving every day and is in a very good place. My littlest brother, Connor, is away at college now and we still keep in touch and can have a conversation without any tension again. My other little brother, Chase, graduated with a bachelors degree in English, and is actually my partner in this blog! We went from not speaking to creating a whole project together and speaking every day now. The power of positivity is unreal, guys! You really have to believe that things can change and then you really have to discipline yourself to put in the hard work to create the change you believe in!
Have a good Monday everyone!